The Pearl River

Greetings earth people! Have you been wondering "What happened to that guy who wanted to write and post pictures about his intergalactic research every day while he is here?"? No? Well he's gotten worms. Not just any worms, no. These are space worms! Contacting space worms is very easy, all you have to do is follow these directions and you too can contact space worms (space worms only exist in Guangzhou... and in space).
Step 1: Drink many a space beer (56%). Step 2: Climb over the railing next to the Pearl River (river colour does not resemble that of a pearl). Step 3: Take out your dick and commence urination into the river (girls can use their vaginas). Step 3: Fall forward, ten feet off the boardwalk, into the Pearl River (girls will need to fall backwards) Step 4: This is an important one. DON'T DROWN.
Time spent in the Pearl River is up to you, I would suggest twenty minutes, as this is how long I spent. And Voila! SPACE WOOOORMS. Space worms can help you with innumerable.... things. Including but not limited to not having to go to work, skateboarding, sit ups, drinking space beers, and meeting women.
I will leave you netizens with some pictures.
Over and out.